My boyfriend and I have been complete open books about EVERYTHING in our past. That being said, there are certainly some stories that I wish I had never heard from him and probably vice-versa. Initially I think it fed into alot of uncertainty and paranoia, mostly on my part, but in retrospect it has really shown me how much both of us do not want to be those people and have pushed ahead and continue to evolve and become people that have self respect and admiration from others and within. I think it is a cathartic and neccesary step to move forward in a relationship, one that seeks to repair and heal the past and not create roadblocks in the road ahead. What cannot be controlled is when those demons and bad choices (ex’s) from the past rear their ugly heads and pop up from under the woodwork. But what I have learned is the best thing to do is just pull them out into the open, confront them and then throw them away. The more solid foundation you have with someone, the easier it is to let them know when these things happen and how you handled the situation to resolve it with the other in consideration.
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